Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Journal

I lost my journal.


Some of you may not see this as a big deal, but to me it really really sucks.
Im not really good about praying.. out loud, or even in my head. Im also not any good at verbalizing my feelings. This is why I really really loved my journal. I could have my daily conversations with Papa and express how I was feeling. It was great and my favorite thing about writing out my prayers is looking back to what I prayed for and seeing how my life has changed since then, what prayers were answered and which ones I need to keep praying for.
You might say "well you could always get another journal".
Yes, you are right. I could totally get another journal but for some reason I just... can't.

Im so depressed about all the memories lost now with that journal. I don't want to think about someone finding it and reading everything and IM so saddened by the fact that I won't get to go back through the pages and see my heart in its purest form.
Im so depressed about it that I can't start over.
So now, Im stuck... my prayer life is lacking because that was how I prayed!
I feel like I lost my best friend. Like a huge piece of who I am is gone.

ugh. Im so dramatic

1 comment:

Lisa said...

hey chels,
this is lisa btw. i didn't wanna just randomly.... freak you out by thinking a stranger is randomly following your blog :)